Gay old grandpas

They have it. I suggested Grandpa for me and Grandad for Guy. Well, apparently, that just wouldn’t work.

But when you only have friends who were born in the Obama era, you miss out.

Older gay men might not know your favorite meme, but they might know how to cook.

We were discussing with my daughter and son-in-law what our new granddaughter would call the both of us. So this conversation went on a bit until I asked Kama (SIL) what he called grandparents as a local Hawaiian.

He said “Tutu”.

I wanted the latter. Your work will be better for it. Perchance, he was your first real glimpse of what love looks like… in its third act.

Writers get that. It doesn’t care about crow’s feet or how fast someone walks.

Guy wanted have them do it the barbaric, I mean modern, way. Or Kuku. (Maybe at the same time.)

Besides, every writer needs someone who tells them when their metaphor smells a little too much like Axe body spray.

🧠 “What Older Gay Men Know (That You Don’t)”

They’ve loved deeply.

They change, learn, laugh, and even text with emojis (though sometimes tragically).

Writers often freeze older characters in time. Writers need that.

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Closing the Notebook, Opening the Door

If you’re writing queer stories, don’t stop at Gen Z. Older Gays Matter, so Reach across the generations. Don’t.

Let a 23-year-old find an unlikely friendship that changes everything.

It’s all about perspective—and your readers will feel the difference.

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They’ve Seen It All—and Still Show Up

The older gay generation didn’t grow up in a time of affirming TV shows and rainbow capitalism. Maybe even heal you.

You’ll gain perspective—and maybe a killer lemon bar recipe.

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Friendship Doesn’t Require a Filter

Ageism in the gay community isn’t subtle—it’s in the swipe-lefts, the party invites, and the hashtags.

Listen. We were to never call adults by their first name. But here’s the twist: those older gays? It reinforces Gambone’s themes and the sense of community among disparate characters, but it also underlines his ambivalence about the right and wrong choices in life.